OFFICIAL COMMUNICATION: professional LAN journal sponsored by disco photo software

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I would just like to professionally thank Europe potty for his extremely offensive journal where he doubted my Chief of Communications role. Imagine going to a LAN where you meet on and get on with someone, and then to fall out with them afterwards when he questions your professionalism....

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Anyway, onto the professional LAN journal.

So firstly, thanks very much to all the people we met along the way - obviously we came to the LAN as a bit of fun, and it was truly wonderful to have people accept that and not treat us too seriously. It genuinely was wicked to see all you mugs get behind a clownshow like ours. I personally had a fantastic time fucking around on the casting couch, drinking A LOT and meeting all of you nerds and had a whale of a time - if there is another LAN, we will be there.

Let's be honest here; As soon as we entered the scene, we professionally dominated it.

Fortunately, we have some very professional camerawork that has helped us document our domination of the ET scene, so lass uns fucking gehen.

So a few of the men arrived earlier (Poland Potty, Europe PaRzi, Germany Francis etc) but I'm writing this journal under immense fucking pressure and I don't have the time nor the will to chronicle their journies. If they wanna say it, they can do it in the comments. Therefore, this professional journal will start on...


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THE TEAM CAME TOGETHER. (L2R: Germany Nico aka Rayzed, France Francis aka Francis, United Kingdom Joe aka niSmO, United Kingdom Potty aka Potty, Germany Carla aka PaRzi, Netherlands Rick aka Enigma, Finland Pete aka Woony (you have to imagine the last two)

We thought that, on Friday night, we deserved some professional relaxation time after our months of studying CP attack phases, so we got some professional Becks in for a wery reasonable price and some not-so-professional shots in. It turns out, however, that shots are more professional than you think once you have had a couple. Would recommend.
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We ended up having a professional drink and an early night (3am? 4am? confirm pls) to prepare for our victories the next day.
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(god Nico is fucking sexy.)


So it turns out United Kingdom Potty snores. Sounded like this but louder, could hear it through the whole fucking apartment:

This meant that, althouygh we had mentally and physically had the preparations in place to win the LAN, Finland Woony was the only professional sleeper as he had earplugs. On Saturday morning, we felt reasonably dishevelled but still professional, and left for the LAN centre.

Again, after practising for the previous 5 years for this moment we felt sexy, professional and well prepared, so we took on a spot of professional motocycle racing.

(Germany Nico won, United Kingdom Potty made the bike go slower)

We also took some pictures with professional supporters of our cause (sponsored by Skandinavia seareal)
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Did some casting
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(L2R: Netherlands pds, Finland Woony, United Kingdom niSmO and Netherlands Enigmaaaaa)


Time for's first professional game on LAN.

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Close game tbh - they were lucky to come away with anything, never mind a win.

Key moments:

Our professional defence:

France Francis showing what we are all about:

Game 2, against those big massive nerdy Germany Germans.
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Never been shat on from so high in my life.

We came away from the games with our heads held high, ready to cunt some nerds in the evening's professional upperbracket special consolation tournament. We decided to relax, have a few bears and prepare ourselves for the professional games later on.



We decided to relax, have a few bears and prepare ourselves for the professional games later on by doing some casting! (If you watch from the start, you can see some professional HYPE on the cameras)


I feel that these were the games where we represented ourselves most professionally, cunting nerds throughout.

GAME 1 - ET<3

First we played big nerds Europe ET<3, who have been playing ET forever.
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Managed to get them good and mad before forfeiting the victory to them - wery professional.


GAME 2 - 6AM

So I have something that needs saying before we commence to talk about this game: United Kingdom fantasyy is a fucking nerd. That is all.
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Quote by fantasyyWe just couldnt break down your defense on supply - too professional!

Quote by fantasyyWe were actually trying

Quote by mAhlaman im so frustrated, why is their missile defence so good

I guess you can see from these professional quotes that we had the enemy nice and scared. Another professional victory from Also, knifed Belgium Nickje (CAN SOMEONE TELL ME THEY HAVE THE REPLAY OF ME KNIFEKILLING ON LAN, PLEASE)

And so, after coming in clear favourites, we overperformed to leave the LAN as top 11 finishers.


Unfortunately, as Sunday dawned, so did United Kingdom brexit, and so our team had to come terms with being professionally split up. And that, is where my story ends for the weekend. Had a professional time, we represented ourselves with utmost professionalism throughout, and came top11.


Germany Carla typed a professional piece summarising life after I left:
Quote by PArZiSunday started out with the sad realization that half of our team had to leave to go back to reality. The remaining soldiers potty, Francois, Rayzed and PaRzi, after mourning the loss of their mates Enigma, niSmo and Woony, joined a group of lan nerds to venture to the local watering hole called "Saloon" What followed were many drinks, gaining new recruits for redemption 2k20 and ended in Nico "The Beautiful" Rayzed taking a nap on a table while being air humped by Ronner. That was the moment PaRzi activated her motherly skills one last time and gathered her nerd children up to go back to the hotel. Back at the hotel, Rayzed present his team with the first edition of which resulted in potty and Francois having a laughing fit up until Francois realized that after a 2 minute power nap it was time to go to the train station. With the real team manager leaving, thisconcluded the end of a fun and messy night. On Monday, the remaining team packed up their bags, hugged and kissed goodbye and went their separate ways knowing that summer boot camp was right around the corner.

It was a pleasure to see you all.
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I rate this journal 11/10 !

This is one of the best journals I have ever seen. Mainly because it captures so many fucking memories over an amazing weekend. I have said thank you to everyone that attended and would like to do so again. Even those who went but never ppost on crossfire like ever... Please just give us a message here from time to time as it's nice to hear from so many of you nerds!

Special thanks to my team for turning up and making it the best possible weekend we could possibly could of had. Joe, francis, carla, rick, pete and nico.... You guys are legit the best team mates ever even if I had to carry the lot of you shit players!

See you nerds next year :)
Top 11 world for our first appearance at LAN. I dont hear the jelly haterz.

Cant name everybody but shoutout to every single nerd I met. <3 (no homo)
Now that LAN is over, my face is no more in danger.
you guys are fucking legends, i rate this journal 5/7
brexit means brexit
i enjoyed it 10/10
shots i need shots, looks like i joined too late to be in the video :(
but we need SHOTS!!!!1111
SHOOOOOTS!!!11 I tried to sneak as many shots into you as I could but you kept running away from us!! :(
as your co-caster I approve
it wasn't bad right? i had a lot of fun on the couch with almighty lefrancis :O
it was brilliant stownagem8
I can see how much fun this was ^^
I regret to have been not there

Thank you <3
golden guys !
too short,

make longer journals nerds
come to LAN if u want to see more professional action, i rolled on the floor together with potty at mcdonalds and u will never see THAT!
I have absolutely no memory of this happpening. Is this true?
At some point I remember rolling under your spread legs xD
I actually remmeber this bit haha!
i recorded this :D
please share m8 xD
thx for bringing your professionalism to the LAN, wouldn't have been the same without you guys!!
well written journal. i rate it

was so much fun to meet you all! cu next LAN <3
Professional Communication from your side there, Joe. I rate this 11/10 with soggy burger.
oh looks whos awake :D
Epic af journal! :D

I rate this 11/10, just like Francis rated my clubbing!
was rly nice meeting you and seeing such a bunch of nice people having the whole time fun and laughing all around.
If you and your team sign up next year we will be prepared to not let you win. The 100euros you slipped me to throw was handy at the bar... However. Next year I'm coming to rekt you and your team!
Vielen Dank for organizing this amazing event, helping with streaming stuffs and running everything smoothly.

On a side note, you maybe forgot but you were part of our very first professional eSports match. :XD
journal approved was nice too meet dear follow soldiers!
Thanks to you - chief of security services at - everything ran very smoothly and our gaming performance was on point. Looking forward to seeing you again m8!
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